MARRIAGE LAUGHS

You have two choices in life:

You can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were dead.

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At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"

"Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."

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A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds: "Husband Wanted"

The next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

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When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.

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A woman is incomplete until she is married. Then she is finished.

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A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"

Father replied, "I don't know, son, I'm still paying.

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"A young son asked,"Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"

Dad replied, "That happens in every country, son."

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Then there was a woman who said,"I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then, it was too late."

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Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say -- talk in your sleep.

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Just think, if it wasn't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.

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First guy says, "My wife's an angel!"

Second guy remarks, "You're lucky. Mine's still alive."

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A Woman's Prayer "Dear Lord, I pray for wisdom, to understand a man , to love and to forgive him, and for patience, for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for strength, I'll just beat him to death."